🚗 What to Say (and Not Say) After Your Child’s Game: The Car Ride Home Guide

For many families, the most emotional part of sports isn’t the scoreboard — it’s the car ride home. That 10–15 minutes after a game can shape how your child feels about themselves, their sport, and even about you as their parent.

The truth? Science and psychology agree: the post-game car ride is not the time for coaching or critiquing. It’s the time for connection.

Here are five proven tips for making the post-game conversation one of encouragement, not pressure.

1. Lead With Unconditional Support

Research from the Institute for the Study of Youth Sports shows that the number one phrase athletes want to hear from their parents after games is:
👉 “I love watching you play.”

That’s it. No breakdown, no stats, no advice — just love.

2. Follow Their Lead

If your child is quiet, resist the urge to fill the silence. Many young athletes need space to process.

• If they want to talk, listen.

• If they don’t, let the ride be peaceful.

Think of it this way: your silence can be a gift.

3. Avoid the “Instant Replay”

Critiquing every play — “Why didn’t you pass?” or “You missed that layup” — creates stress and resentment.

Instead, save technical feedback for the coach and let the car be about relationship, not review.

👉 Real example: One HorsePower parent stopped breaking down plays in the car and noticed their son became more eager to talk about the game later that evening, on his own terms.

4. Ask Open-Ended Questions

When your athlete does want to talk, guide with curiosity instead of judgment.

• “What was your favorite moment today?”

• “What did you learn from that game?”

• “How did you feel out there?”

These invite reflection and growth instead of defensiveness.

5. End on Joy

Win or lose, help your child leave the game behind and enjoy being a kid. Turn on music, grab ice cream, or talk about something unrelated.

👉 These small rituals remind them that their value doesn’t depend on performance.

The Takeaway

The car ride home is one of the most influential coaching moments a parent will ever have — not for skills, but for heart. By focusing on love, listening, and joy, you’ll strengthen your relationship and keep the game fun.

At 707 HorsePower, we believe in developing athletes and people. That means equipping families with tools to support the journey.